I cannot imagine how my sex life would be today without SwingBot. I highly doubt that I would enjoy it nearly as much as I do. He really opened my eyes to so many possibilities that I enjoy now.
I had partners before I met SwingBot, but they were nothing like he is. My first long-term partner and I were both pretty new to the sex game and quite “vanilla.” We tried different positions and oral sex, but trying sex in odd locations (one I cannot remember and the other a single-person restroom on a boat rented for a company party) was about as wild as we got.
My second long-term partner introduced me to a couple fun kinks that I still enjoy today: bondage and toys. He had a vibrator that he gifted to me, my first sex toy, when we broke up on friendly terms. He tied me up and blindfolded me a few times and I did the same to him in turn. He also had a thing for food, such as using whipped cream. While I am glad that I tried food play for the experience, I learned that I am not really into it. With him, I started pondering sexual fantasies — particularly of MMF threesomes — and discussed such with him. We never did threesomes, but he would have been willing, as long as there was no substantial MM action.
My third long-term partner was a depressing return to “vanilla” sex. His idea of sex seemed to be “Man gets aroused, man sticks penis into woman, man cums, done.” He only bothered to do things to please me physically, such as perform cunnilingus, when I was unresponsive to his interest. Even then, he did only enough to get me going so he could insert penis, thrust, and finish. During my relationship with him, my enjoyment of sex plummeted and my sex drive dropped with it. I tossed the vibrator my previous partner had given me, despairing that I would never be eager for sex again.
My fourth long-term partner was not terribly long-term, but enough to count. He renewed my enthusiasm for sex, though he was also fairly “vanilla.” He did spice things up by adding an element not heavily integrated before in my sex life: romance. He treated me to traditionally romantic gifts like weekends in nice hotels or B&Bs and appointments at the spa. He did take an interest in my sexual gratification, asking what I liked and experimenting with my reactions to things that he did. I am not sure, but I think that he was the one to discover that my toes are an erogenous zone.
I also had some one-night stands scattered between long-term partners and those were mostly mundane. The one-night stands consisted of “Go to a convenient location, thrust penis into vagina, cum, part ways.” I did have one who wanted me to scratch his skin so that I drew blood, but I felt uncomfortable with that idea and did not oblige.
Finally, I met SwingBot. Though his sex history was extremely limited, his self-exploration, interest in porn, and imagination were not. He knew that he was bisexual and that he enjoyed being penetrated anally. He was quite upfront with his interests and turn-ons from the start. He told me that he figured I would either run away screaming or stick around and he should know sooner than later. We were both pleased that I not only opted to stick around, but was highly interested in his ideas. Our first night together, we did Cowgirl and 69. During the mutual oral stimulation, he prompted me to finger his ass and immediately came when I did. That thrilled and amazed me. The idea that a man would want to be penetrated was beyond my experience; previous partners with whom the topic was even raised made it clear that they considered their anuses “Exit Only,” whether or not they considered my ass fair game.
SwingBot already had a few sex toys and an extensive collection of porn when I met him. Now having someone with whom he could use sex toys, his toy collection became our toy collection and grew. He would sometimes surprise me with new toys and sometimes have me shop the sex toy catalogs with him. I did not really get into watching porn, but he kept growing that collection, too, and it helped fuel our sex life. He elaborated on bondage to an extent that I would not have dared, but do enjoy. We have probably at least as many insertable toys intended for use in him as we do for me. We have vibrators, strap-on dildos, double-ended dildos, inflatable dildos, and butt-plugs.
With SwingBot, I have learned that I:
– like being tied down so I can be teased and pleasured without interfering,
– like tying my partner down to be in control even more,
– find bondage gear that I would not personally wear very sexy on my partner,
– can be a switch and sometimes be submissive (or equal), but mostly like being dominant,
– am not a big fan of receiving anal sex, but absolutely love to f**k my man’s ass,
– am bisexual and would like to have sex with a woman without a man involved,
– love being with a bisexual man, because we both fantasize about MMF threesomes that involve some MM action, and
– really enjoy sharing sex toys with my partner.
He has also helped me rediscover sensitive spots, like my toes, my underarm, and the surface of my anus. He finds pleasing me pleasurable, which makes pleasing him pleasurable for me. We can talk about our fantasies and our fantasies can feed each other’s ideas. For example, I used to think that MMF would be nice just for double-penetration or so my mouth and vagina could be occupied at the same time, but SwingBot’s fantasies have added to my interest in such threesomes; now I would like to 69 while a man plows SwingBot’s ass or f**k SwingBot while he sucks off another man. He wants me to have a girlfriend, not for the stereotypical male reasons of being able to watch (though he would happily watch if invited) or for a FFM threesome, but because he knows I would like to have sex with a woman and he would like me to be sexually pleasured any way I want. We agree that we would love to find another FM couple, both people being bi, with whom we could do any number of mix-and-match situations, particularly featuring threesomes or MM and FF couplings.
With all this, it is hard to look back at my previous partners and think about how little I knew of myself sexually before I got together with SwingBot. I had more actual experience and figured that I would be teaching him a thing or two, but I learned so much from him! I shudder to think of ever trying anything with another “vanilla” partner who freaks out about the idea of my inserting butt-plug in his rectum or views the female orgasm as optional.
Update: SwingBot has a great post about his side of the story at https://tmblr.co/ZvLu5l1fVyXjC